Fake Prom 2009



UPDATE: MATCHMAKING FOR FAKE PROM 2009 IS NOW CLOSED! EVERYONE WHO SIGNED UP WILL BE NOTIFIED OF THEIR MATCH SOON. CHECK YOUR EMAIL OVER THE NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS! What’s the rumpus? Why so glum? Ahh, I get it. Your old pal here can see through that ol' soft-shoe routine of yours. You ain't got no partner-in-crime and yer looking for some nice arm-candy for this Fake Prom thing coming up. Well, because I trust ya - I'll let you in on this little scheme I got cooking. I got me a couple of Matchmakers here and if you give 'em a bit of information, they'll fix you right up with a Fake Date. What's the big idea of a Fake Date? Well, I'm glad you asked. Word has gotten around that people feel strong-armed into bringing a date to Fake Prom. Well that ain't right. Nobody should miss out on Fake Prom because they're running stag. So to take the heat off, the Matchmakers offer stress-free and obligation-free Fake Dates to anyone that wants 'em. The Matchmakers look at your questionnaires, run all the numbers by the bookies, and then pair you up with a like-minded guy or gal. See, what makes 'em fake dates is that mum's the word on expectations. You may decide to meet up beforehand and coordinate outfits or maybe you just want to save each other a dance for some point during the evening. Fake Dates are really just a fun and pressure-free way to meet someone you don't know. Who knows? This could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship. UPDATE: MATCHMAKING FOR FAKE PROM 2009 IS NOW CLOSED! EVERYONE WHO SIGNED UP WILL BE NOTIFIED OF THEIR MATCH SOON. CHECK YOUR EMAIL OVER THE NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS! Your Name: Your Age: Your e-mail address (mandatory): I am a: Palooka (guy) I am a: Canary (gal) I would like to go to Fake Prom with a: Cat (guy) Canary (girl) You like meeting people who: have very similar interests have very dissimilar interests have many interests have no interests (CHECK ALL THAT APPLY) Have you ever been on a blind date? Yes No When first meeting someone new, are you Quiet and shy Quiet, but open up quickly Talkative - a real stool pigeon Awkward A real smooth operator Fairly normal (by your own standards) A real cut-up Hard-boiled What are you hoping to get out of Fake Prom? (Check all that apply) An overall fun night Some dancing Lots of dancing Some boozing Lots of boozing Make outs with randoms Make outs with your date Hook-up(s) Making someone jealous Impressing your friends Party till you puke! Which role would you say best describes you? A real straight shooter An old-fashioned femme fatale A shady character A reformed ex-con just trying to make good A dastardly gambler The most reliable fence in town A drifter with dark, sorrowful eyes A private eye with dubious morals So what kinds of things keep a yeg like you busy? Staking out a bootlegging rival's mountain hideout - I love the outdoors. Taking bets for the weekend's fights - I love sports. Combing through the scandal sheets for the lowdown - I love books Modeling the latest designers at the club - I'm all about fashion. Leaving the tommy-gun at home and keeping a real violin in the case - Just call me a music snob. What would you say is your best asset? I can handle myself in a barroom brawl. I'm fluent in several languages and know who to pay off. I'm known for playing honest. I'm known for playing both sides off each other. Been around the block a couple times (wisdom) I'm good at making objects of my desire weak in the knees I'm always cracking wise I got a nice set of gams What kind of jazz are you slipping a couple finskis to the bandleader in order to hear? That beatnik jazz-bop sound This up-and-coming new think they're calling “rock'n'roll”. The Top 40 Syndicate - Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, Kanye, etc RIP MJ I'm a tough punk and I like punk. Some Beethoven or Count Basie (you know, intelligent bullshit). I doubt you've heard of it Nothing In a dust-up with a real tough customer at a whiskey joint, what do you rely on? Witty banter These two fists. (smack, smack) Ice-cold, dead-eyed glare Get help from an ex-boxer friend who owes you a favor. hop in that Buick and get outta Dodge When seeking council to get you out of a jam, you'd likely go to? The neighbourhood mob boss. Your sweetheart of a secretary. Father O'Flaherty Sing to the coppers Consult whatever's left in your flask and a cup of joe (black of course) What best describes your level of dating skills? Beginner Basic Expert Master Licensed Private Eye. Which of the following is most important in choosing a significant other? Honour Wisdom Book-learnin' Street Smarts Never been pinched. Air of mystery. Knows how to handle him/herself in a tough spot . A real cute disposition. A real fancy dancer. My idea of an ideal dinner-date would be: A seven-course meal at a fine French restaurant, hopefully without piano-player shootings. Skip dinner, hit the ponies together and get drunk off your winnings after. Take a leisurely stroll around the park, with shared nips from your flask and without a care in the world. Strolling past the doorman into the hottest new saloon and dancing the night away How do you imagine your fake date ending?: Sullenly asking "What's the point?" while all the money is whipped away by the wind. Sharing a dry martini on a rooftop as the sun rises, content that you two solved the mystery. Divvying up the loot. Holing up in your safehouse with your new partner in crime. Running into the surf with your date as the radioactive material burns down the house. On the lam, trying to avoid Johnny Law. Dames is: Trouble Trouble Trouble Here's your chance to expand on the above questions! Tell us a bit more about what you'd like to get out of Fake Prom and the Matchmaking service. Just seeing who you'd get matched with? Hoping for a perfect date? Want to meet someone new? Let us know anything else you'd like to tell us!